Don't Tap on the Aquarium

As I watch my dear friend get sucked out on the third time in one night, I must remind him; "please sir, don't tap the aquarium."


It's inevitable isn't it? Your sitting there with a monster hand and another player gets all in with a dominated hand - or worse yet, with only 1-3 outs; then BAMM! Your eye's open wide, your mouth drops, and you stand there like someone just hit you over the head; you just been sucked out on and lost a monster pot - or worse yet, knocked out of the tournament. As a regular poker player I can't count the number of times where I've been drawn out and lost all my chips to another's mistake. How many of us had their Ace's cracked when all the money went in preflop? How about your Kings when your facing pocket-twos? Got Trips and someone shoves with nothing more to an inside-straight draw with one card to come? Already know the result?


I can go on all night and talk about these types of situations, the problem is that it will not do any good. Ever since the Big Poker Bang of 2003, multitudes of people from all walks of life have gained interest in poker. Most of these "players" have gotten used to the fast-paced, super aggressive poker that is aired across the world. These new breed of players want to take shots, gamble, and show everyone at the table that they will not be bossed out of the pot - even if they hold K5 os UTG. Some of these players run very lucky and win thousands in just a few short months. Their poker portfolio can look more impressive than a person's who have been playing for years. They show multiple online table wins, big scores, and no one can stop them. These new players might even get honorable mention in media sources like CardPlayer Magazine for their unbelievable rushes. But with every success story comes hundreds - if not thousands - of losses.

As much as I respect Phil Hellmuth as a knowledgable player I can never cheer for him in a tournament because of his constant bickering at the table. Phil has no problem calling fish, fish - and donkeys, donkeys. The same goes for other great players like Mike Matasow; these players make sure that everyone at their table knows they been sucked out on when it happens. What people like Phil fail to realize is that these are the same people that aided him in receiving his 11th bracelet this year. The reason Mike ran 2nd on the Bellagio Cup III. These fish are the ones who donate their chips time after time, giving the patient and skilled players their take.

What I am about to say applies to my friend, along with the likes of Phil Hellmuth and Mike the Mouth. "Don't tap on the Aquarium". You see this sign all over any major aquarium, and it's promptly displayed on those huge gigantic bowls of water. They place these signs there because tapping on the aquarium disturbs the fish.

Why would a player want someone who always puts their money in when they have the best hand to stop and start putting their money in with the worse? Why do you want your opponent to start playing correctly? Do you not face enough challenging people at your table that you warrant another? Pardon my ignorance, but I can not possibly think of one reason why you do not want a clueless person in your game.

Sure I've been sucked out on numerous times. I've had my Aces cracked, I've lost monster hands to miracle cards, and even been on the negative end of a one-outer. The fact is, it doesn't matter. Sure we get upset and we want to reach over and strangle the bastard for calling all his chips off with a draw, or some weak holding; but why tell that opponent that he did wrong?

Let's look at a few reasons why you shouldn't tap on glass that holds water:

1. You are telling the person he/she is playing incorrect. The person might start analyzing situations more and make less mistakes. Poker is a break even game if everyone plays optimally. You make a profit when another player makes a negative EV move.

2. You might chase away that player. Most people do not like being insulted. They might feel embarrassed or have hard feelings and leave the game. Some times they never come back to play in your game - instead he's donating to your neighbors game that you don't play in.

3. You're announcing to the other players that your tilting. Good players are going to pick up on this and play back at you with weaker hands which can have diasterous results to your bankroll.

4. You will make money on the long run. Poker is not a game of now. It's a game of then and when. Your past added with your future gives you the bases of what type of player you are and going to be. If you lose to this player tonight, or even this month - as long as you play your game (which is more skillful then his) you will be profitable. Luck only last so long, eventually skill has to even everything out to keep the system balanced.

While some of you can come up with a few more reasons, the point I am trying to make is there is no reason to berate a bad player. Instead encourage his play. Laugh about the suck out, shake his hand. Congratulate him on his monster win then get the chips back. You want these players sitting at your table because they are the ones that put money in your bankroll. They donate their hard earn money night after night chasing dreams and draws. Today you just got unlucky and you had to make a contribution to the poker community. There is nothing you can do - you have to expect a larger amount of variance with so make armatures now playing poker. These variances can be huge and unavoidable, but it does you no good when trying to recoup your losses if you scare all the fish away.

So the next time a player rivers his 1 outer and knocks you out of the tournament on the bubble; and you sit there pondering how he could call your preflop raise, your bet on the flop, and your check-raise all in on the turn with nothing more then a draw.... stop and realize that you're playing poker. In today's poker, nothing has to make sense - just keep getting your money in with the best hand and eventually the scale will balance out in your favor. Just do everyone else at the table a favor before you join the rail, "Don't tap on the aquarium, it disturbs the fish."